red right ankles

It's been a good week. My dress came and was beautiful. and was too big (i thought it was going to be too small). now i just need to get it fitted.
Monk and i spent saturday day doing chores, having hanky panky, and getting his finger sized so i can order his ring. then we followed up the evening with some new friends, which was much fun. a little karaoke (i did worse than usual, but eh it was fun as usual). had a tiny bit of social anxietybut nothing much.
I forgot it was "jump ahead" time and had to wake up earleir than i wanted to go to brunch and teh conservatory of flowers with my best girls. followed by used book stores, lunch, and an attempt to make yoga class.
we didn't make it so we made up our own yoga in the stretching room.

tonight we had a picnic of cracked crab with garlic lemon butter, huge salad and baguette. i decided to pretend it's not raining and feel beachy.

and in other areas of life, i'm ruminating really hard on what i want to do with my life. I want to be in a relationship with and be married to monk. I want to have a baby.. but that's not all i want to be/can be. I am thinking hard on the different areas of life that appeal to me> right now there's Therapist, Doula and children's librarian.

all of these appeal for reasons and have problems as well. and maybe my calling is something entirely different. or maybe .. waht if.. i don't have a calling. i just don't know..

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