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2004-07-15

it's thursday, right?

argh. saw a house today that is so perfect. why do i have to wait 2.5 more months (i know why. just whining)

had dinner with a good gf last night. she's in a place i was 4 years ago. the only real thing i could say that wasn't a platitude about 'time' (doesn't one just begin to hate time?) was that maybe it's good to allow oneself to be crazy for awhile. that holding it together might be weaker than just experiencing everything you're feeling in an honest way. i mean, you shouldn't necessarily express it to everyone who crosses your path. but when you're alone? make that box that personifies crazy. make the crazy lists. write the crazy letters and then throw them away.

anyway. dinner was good, and it was good to spend time with her.

i'm feeling stressy with not having enough time to clean my room or figure out house stuff or figure out what i want to move with or get rid of. gotta find some time for that someday.

life was supposed to slow down a bit after this past weekend. it doesn't seem to be the case yet.

also, it was a scary discovery to realize. i *could* probably feel like that again. the more i invest the more i realize. i could feel that way again, of course. even if i am stronger.


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