open up to the sun

aigh. half asleep. just lost the entry i was typing.

my belly is clenched in on itself like a sea anenome, protecting itself from the emotions that were knocking themselves around during my topsy turvy dreams.

i have nothing to prove to my subconscious, i think it can leave me the fuck alone already.

i had great hopeful dreams and then. and then. same old same old, clenched belly, clenched fists, squeezed shut eyes, small sleep screams, wet ears, and that awful feeling of hopelessness and throwing myself bodily against something that won't budge.

enough already, motherfucker. and by motherfucker, i mean you brain&heart.

and now i have to get up even though it's only 9:30 because i have breakfast to go to with the 'crew'. when did i get a crew? and then i will work in the pirate store for the afternoon. and then i have some monk to mack on. (ha ha)

unfurl little belly&heart. dreams are just that. take a shower and open up to the sun again.

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