so there

sometimes it's so hard to remember that

reality isn't necessarily the way i envision it in my head

that not all my relationships have hte weight i give them

or the return i imagine there to be.

or just aren't equal.

and that's ok. or it has to be and should be ok and all that.

but i have to remind msyelf awful often.

and i don't really like the reminding.

i'm not a very good self-task-master.

and there are other ways this little reality monster bites me on the ass. don't even think for a second that it's centralized to relationships. nuh uh.

tonight i'm eating me some french fucking food. so there.

(but the way of the world *should* be. that i'm as important to you as you are to me. stupid world and your stupid contrary anti-heather ways)

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