awareness

how am i culpable.

because i know that in some ways i must be.

depending on the kind of scene i try to surround myself with

to the kind of relationships i am drawn to.

to the kind of laziness i inject into some friendships.

how many people have this much of this in their lives?

how many people are attracted to some level of chaos..that cycles through different relationships.

is it partially my choices combined with their choices and ..just the natural course of things.

this isn't about self blame or outward pointing fingers.

i just like to always know at least *my* negative and positive role in things. not that i ever do anything about it. but at least i'm aware.

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