get on with it.

"go to sleep you little baby. didn't leave nobody but the babe"

god the O Brother Where Art Thou soundtrack is amazing.

i have pain behind my eyes. the sun shone heavily into my room this morning.

i wait to have epiphanic moments all the time.

i'm a product of the media around me. i realize this.

when i was younger it meant that i left a relationship because i expected life to be filled with a montage of perfect moments (it was doomed anyway. i was only 16 when we met... i didn't learn enough in that relationship). i was shocked and let down by the fact that life is full of mundane beauty peppered with perfect moments.

so now i knwo that and i even love the mundane moments.

but i still wait for a movie-like moment in which everything turns. that moment where the light goes on. and the music swells. and i realize what i've been doing and what i want. and everything changes.

hell, i have these moments all the time. and i think "it's different now. i've changed" and they usually last about two days.

change very rarely (if ever?) happens suddenly. it's a painful long horrible process that feels like you're ripping open your very insides and turning them inside out.

don't that suck?

yea.

let's commiserate.

...

moment over.

get on with it.

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