mine

i've been sick all week. finally loosening the things that are clogging down in my lungs. like the walls are crumbling and coming out in hacks and bursts.

last night i went out with my best friend and neighbor boy. tentative and shrinking from the light, i realized i hadn't been out in over a week.

m and i parried and lunged and pulled back. tender with our resentments and issues that never quite seem to go away. but as it wore on, we wore down and it smoothed back into what is good about us. like the familiar thumbprint indentation in a worrystone. and some of the dim-spit-feeling sloughed off and by my 2nd glass of redness i was toasty and fine. realizing i hadn't really had much to drink in over a week.

at home , realizing i'd left my wicked witch of the west book at the wine bar. boogie and i traipsed back down through the night of my neighborhood. clusters of people on corners or spilling out of doorways. smilng at me, me smiling back. brief conversations with strangers. people charmed by boogie's zest for the walk . leaning down to pat him. i was re-charmed by my neighborhood and myself. and i felt a little more heather than i have in awhile.

and i'm going through something. and there are only two choices.

and they are mine.

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